I've begun to understand better how often I am "triggered" by a variety of things and how that relates back to traumas I've undergone in my life, especially living with Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer (MBC) since my de novo diagnosis in 2017. Identifying and defining a trigger is often helpful for me to understand … Continue reading Triggers

Shared Decision Making

This concept of Shared Decision Making is a relatively new one for me and so, as usual, I want to start with a definition. This one is a good general definition from a handout from Shared decision making is a key component of patient- centered health care. It is a process in which clinicians … Continue reading Shared Decision Making

The Pressure to “Make Every Day Count”

One of the main suggestions I've received (and mainly followed) for dealing with a terminal illness is to be more mindful, to live in the moment, to focus on what can be done NOW rather than looking back or looking ahead too much. For those of us who are usually the planners in the family, … Continue reading The Pressure to “Make Every Day Count”


When I was actively practicing law, I moved among different courthouses, different counties, and different levels of the legal system. In some scenarios, attorneys would show up to cover for another attorney or somehow otherwise didn’t know what their client(s) looked like. Because of this, it was not uncommon for the lawyer to then quietly … Continue reading Names

Grief versus Regret

I was watching one of my favorite TV shows the other day, A Million Little Things, and as often happens, how they dealt with the concept we'd been discussing in a support group that same week resonated with me. In the episode I was watching (and warning, spoiler alert!!), Rome Howard, a character played by … Continue reading Grief versus Regret

When Convenience and Patient Care Collide

Recently, I was informed of a new process at my cancer center. This information was provided by a scheduling person who was clearly extremely taken aback when I questioned what she wanted me to do and then refused to do what she had been told to schedule. I figured out a workaround for the unacceptable … Continue reading When Convenience and Patient Care Collide


It took me some time after my Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer (MBC) de novo diagnosis in 2017 to figure out how open I wanted to be about my diagnosis and living with cancer.  That was partially because I didn’t know what I was going to do with my law firm and my clients.  I’d always been … Continue reading Strength

Allostatic Load

I had a Twitter account for my business before I was diagnosed with Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer (MBC) in 2017 but I didn't "know" anyone on Twitter or really understand how Twitter works. Oh, how times have changed!! A few years ago, I started getting more active on Twitter, specifically in the cancer advocacy … Continue reading Allostatic Load


I hate being vulnerable and I suspect that most people don't particularly enjoy the feeling either. Recently, I had to be in a situation of physical vulnerability (i.e., naked) in order to access radiation treatment and I started thinking about how often those of us who are patients are put into a position of vulnerability. … Continue reading Vulnerability

I understand … another rant

I warned you, didn’t I?! I hate it when people who have no idea what they are talking about make a vague and surface-y attempt to appear empathetic by saying “I understand.” Also, the tone is a big issue. When I am attempting to advocate for myself and demonstrate to someone how their behavior demeans … Continue reading I understand … another rant