Happy New Year, 2026

At the end of each year, I spend some time looking back, not to castigate myself for failures, but to consider what has happened, learn from what has happened, and to look forward. As LM Montgomery wrote in Anne of Green Gables: “Isn’t it nice to think that tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it yet?” This annual exercise helps me focus on the year ahead by reminding me what went well and what didn’t; in other words, showing me what to carry forward and what to leave behind. While much of what I’ve written in the past is included below, you can read more in my posts from New Years Day in past years: 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2024, and 2025.

One way many people celebrate the New Year is to set intentions or resolutions for the year. Pretty sure one of the only entities that benefits from this practice are the gyms who collect lots and lots of memberships in January and then don’t have to provide services since many don’t follow through. I read somewhere a statistic about how few people actually follow through on New Year’s resolutions and it was abysmal.  Instead of coming up with something that I might or might not follow through on, what I’ve done for the past few years is to pick a word for the year and that has been a rewarding and often unexpectedly illuminating experience.

Indulge me for a few minutes of reminiscing about the words I’ve picked since my MBC diagnosis in 2017 before I share what word has chosen me for 2026.

My word for 2018 was JOY and that reminded me to find the joy in the every day moments as well as to look for joy in the moments that did not seem joyful.  I meditated on joy for 2018 and found that if I truly looked for joy, I found it.  I found joy even during the most difficult days.  I found joy in small moments and the big ones. I found joy over and over.

For 2019, my word was EMBRACE.   Those of you who know me and my midwestern bubble, all of the embracing and touching expected down in Miami was (and is) such a stretch for me! I’ve gotten used to it so much that when I’m out of Miami, I lean in for the kiss or hug as a habit now. Made for some awkward exchanges when I was in San Antonio for the San Antonio Breast Cancer Symposium (SABCS) in 2019, especially with some researchers from other countries, but also engendered some laughs. When we travel to Washington DC to advocate for key issues on Capitol Hill, our favorite stop is the Miami Congressperson’s office because they always have Cuban coffee available!

For 2020, my word was SACRED. Boy did I not know what I was getting myself into!! Only a few months into 2020, we learned about COVID-19 and the closures began. March came and we became immersed in virtual learning, which continued far longer than anyone anticipated. I watched as conference after conference I had intended to attend in 2020 was canceled or moved online. I watched friends die from afar, in particular my dear friend and soul sister, Emily Garnett, cursing those missed moments with them. We spent a LOT of time together as a family. Our living room couches and chairs became a parkour playground for the boys and every Zoom call I took had their heads bouncing in the background, something a lot of people continue to remind me. The biggest gain I saw in 2020 was how close my boys became and how much sacred family time we had.

For 2021, my word was GRATITUDE. As the pandemic continued and so much in the world felt chaotic, the time I spent focused on being grateful for what we have helped tremendously. We learned to balance risk and focus on what we CAN do rather than what we can’t. We traveled a little more in 2021 and I got to see more people from other places. Hugs became even more significant and we dealt with progression of the cancer in my body and a medication change. 2021 wasn’t easy and we learned a little more about our resilience and who we can count on.  Learning to be grateful for all of it, the good and the bad was an unexpected lesson and one I carry forward.

For 2022, my word was PERSISTENCE. Thanks to my dear friend, Warrior Megsie for the very appropriate gift of a bracelet with that very word inside! As the new year dawned, we had no idea how much persistence would be required for 2022. Progression in January meant that the cancer escaped my bones and spread to my liver and back into IV chemo I went. Not only did the pandemic continue with even fewer protections for those of us with a compromised immune system, but we moved from Miami to Orlando at the end of that IV chemo treatment schedule and we had to reassemble our lives and my medical teams. And then came sepsis in the middle of a hurricane and a long slow recovery. I wasn’t sad to leave 2022 behind along with all of the necessary persistence it required just to get through it.

At the very end of 2022, we learned of the death of a dear dear friend, Silke Pfleuger, from MBC. We lose people all the time in the MBC Community and sometimes I think I’m doing better at this grief thing. And then someone else dies and my heart is ripped asunder yet again. My word for 2023, in her honor, was ADVENTURE. I started the year with a heavy heart and the losses piled up throughout the year. In the midst of carrying the grief and loss, I learned to embrace the possibilities around me, to say yes to those things that were challenging, and to forge ahead undaunted. Throughout the year, I felt Silke and others, whispering in my ear and reminding me to remember them as they’d lived, to take the grief and the worry and the angst and put that towards advocacy — to stare undeterred into the abyss. 2023 was a lot and included another progression and big decisions, including a big swing by enrolling in an immunotherapy clinical trial.

My word for 2024 was BEAUTY. I began 2024 at one of the lowest points I’ve experienced since my MBC diagnosis in 2017. With a focus on beauty, I wanted to develop the discipline to watch for glimmers of beauty in myself, in others, in the world around us, in this terrible awful no-good disease.  We all need something good, something pure, something to marvel at, especially when facing such horror and trauma, over and over. As usual, beauty showed up in ways that I didn’t expect this year, in people, in relationships, in experiences, in discussions, in my children, in how we each pick ourselves up over and over, continuing on despite the struggles. My world became both smaller and larger in 2024, but what remains was and is truly beautiful.

My word for 2025 was INWARD. It wasn’t very long after my MBC diagnosis that I decided to be open about what it is like to live with a terminal cancer diagnosis, so much so that the tag line to this blog is “Living Out Loud.” The downside to this choice of being open has been attention that hasn’t been so comfortable and painful assumptions that have interfered with precious relationships. Some internal focus, regrouping and reorganizing was in order and my priorities needed to be reworked. I’m thankful I spent that time looking inward and preparing for 2026.

Medically, 2025 was even more complicated with cardiac toxicity, blood clots inside my heart from a port that wasn’t appropriately fitted to my body, and yet another progression, resulting in starting my 10th line of treatment. In addition to the MBC specific experiences, I was also diagnosed with a second primary cancer, melanoma, and underwent surgery in November. A full medical update is coming next week, so stay tuned.

And now we get to 2026:

I came across the above picture while scrolling through instagram and it resonated with me so much as well as explaining much of what I needed in 2025 — as usual, I began with one idea of what Inward meant and ended the year with a very different experience. Letting go of what wasn’t serving me was preparation for what’s next and I had to be ready to run.

For 2026, the word that has chosen me is MOVEMENT, which has a variety of meanings in different contexts. There has been a significant amount of movement in my medical care, in the physical world, but also through the internal work I’ve been doing throughout 2025. The words from the picture above resonate so strongly with me and underscore the various facets of movement: momentum, action, courage, instinct, freedom, confidence, and “ready to run.” I am looking forward to hitting the ground running for 2026 and experiencing how movement shows up this year!

Picking a word of the year is always a little different as I navigate this living while dying thing. Different words come to me and then I see them everywhere as I begin thinking about choosing one. I firmly believe that God brings to me what I need to be focusing on and He uses whichever word He brings me in ways I don’t anticipate. Whatever it is, I know that it will be an entertaining experience that will stretch me beyond my wildest dreams!!

So long 2025 and hello 2026 — leaving Fear behind and walking with Courage into 2026.