Another patient advocate living with Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer (MBC) wrote a post on Facebook a while back about all the things we lose to MBC. She labeled these things "little deaths" to distinguish these losses from one's eventual death, but also, I believe, to drive home the point that we must grieve the … Continue reading Little Deaths
Category: Advocacy
Remembering Emily Garnett
On July 17, 2021, from noon until 7 pm, on a very warm and often overcast day in Westchester, NY, friends and family gathered to celebrate the life of Emily Garnett. Some of you who are reading this post knew her or knew of her, others maybe not. When I went back to my list … Continue reading Remembering Emily Garnett
Hurt People Hurt People
I’ve written before about the horrifying reality that there are those people who pretend to have cancer, even metastatic cancer. You can read about those previous experiences here. That was quite a while ago and happened when I was relatively new to Stage IV metastatic breast cancer (MBC) and the culture within that community (also … Continue reading Hurt People Hurt People
Surfside disaster
Miami, Florida, has been in the national news lately for a truly horrific disaster. On June 24, 2021, in the wee hours of the morning, one of the towers of the 12 story condo building called “Surfside” on Miami Beach suddenly collapsed. Most of the residents and guests were deeply asleep. A lucky few heard … Continue reading Surfside disaster
Triggers
I've begun to understand better how often I am "triggered" by a variety of things and how that relates back to traumas I've undergone in my life, especially living with Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer (MBC) since my de novo diagnosis in 2017. Identifying and defining a trigger is often helpful for me to understand … Continue reading Triggers
Shared Decision Making
This concept of Shared Decision Making is a relatively new one for me and so, as usual, I want to start with a definition. This one is a good general definition from a handout from http://www.healthit.gov: Shared decision making is a key component of patient- centered health care. It is a process in which clinicians … Continue reading Shared Decision Making
The Pressure to “Make Every Day Count”
One of the main suggestions I've received (and mainly followed) for dealing with a terminal illness is to be more mindful, to live in the moment, to focus on what can be done NOW rather than looking back or looking ahead too much. For those of us who are usually the planners in the family, … Continue reading The Pressure to “Make Every Day Count”
Names
When I was actively practicing law, I moved among different courthouses, different counties, and different levels of the legal system. In some scenarios, attorneys would show up to cover for another attorney or somehow otherwise didn’t know what their client(s) looked like. Because of this, it was not uncommon for the lawyer to then quietly … Continue reading Names
Grief versus Regret
I was watching one of my favorite TV shows the other day, A Million Little Things, and as often happens, how they dealt with the concept we'd been discussing in a support group that same week resonated with me. In the episode I was watching (and warning, spoiler alert!!), Rome Howard, a character played by … Continue reading Grief versus Regret
When Convenience and Patient Care Collide
Recently, I was informed of a new process at my cancer center. This information was provided by a scheduling person who was clearly extremely taken aback when I questioned what she wanted me to do and then refused to do what she had been told to schedule. I figured out a workaround for the unacceptable … Continue reading When Convenience and Patient Care Collide
No Half Measures 