Grief anniversaries

 

https://johnpavlovitz.com/2016/03/11/acknowledging-our-grief-anniversaries/

readthisrecentlyresonateswithso. I’veofextendedfamilynot yetthoseanniversariesdifficult, no anniversaries are as difficult as those that mark milestones in my stage IV metastatic breast cancer.

My grief anniversaries are now not only fixed dates when important parts of my treatment occurred but also experiences like going to an infusion center. While I’ve not seen any studies or literature, I believe that PTSD is a thing for cancer patients and it can be horribly debilitating. Horribly.

With the holidays approaching, more grief anniversaries approach. You see, anticipatory grief is a thing too. Those of us living with a terminal disease have no idea which holiday will be our last.

That’s a heck of a lot of grief to anticipate.

19 thoughts on “Grief anniversaries

    1. I’m getting more used to living with ambiguity. I experience the positive and negative emotions so often and that’s been hard to get used to. I’m not comfortable with it but it is less hard. Hoping for love to surround you this holiday season and always. ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I feel your pain and I much empathy with how you are struggling.
    While my sister was living with her terminal illness of ALS, she struggled with the grief that every day might be her last day on earth, it was a terrible burden for her.
    The article by John Pavlovitz was excellent!
    I am anticipating ‘the grief anniversary’ of my sister that will soon be upon me and I know it shall be hard to bear!
    So many days I say to myself, “I just want you back, dear sister.”
    I wish you peace and strength and courage!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you for reading and commenting. I think this concept of grief anniversaries is something most people experience without a name for it. I definitely did. Having a name for it and knowing that it is a thing that others experience as well is helpful for me. Wishing you and your family love and light.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. There have been studies on PTSD in women with early stage breast cancer. If I remember correctly it’s 80% of early stagers who experience some sort of PTSD .I mean…early stage and stage 4 are two different worlds. I wonder what our statistic is…150%?? Hugs 💕

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  3. I think you’re right about PTSD. My wife relives some of it but I may have it worse. She went through so much pain and suffering, I can’t stand it when she gets sick now. I still get afraid. So I think caregivers can suffer too.

    Liked by 2 people

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