When I was diagnosed with Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer (MBC), I had recently turned 38 and was tandem breastfeeding my almost two (2) year old and almost (4) year old. Breast cancer was the farthest thing from my mind when I felt the lump in my left breast and I got my very first mammogram in order to get diagnosed.
I was lucky. My primary care physician took my symptoms seriously and sent me for the necessary tests to determine what was going on, but others are not so lucky. Other women I know weren’t diagnosed for a long time because, in part, there is a belief perpetuated in a variety of circles that young women can’t get breast cancer. They are often told “you are too young to get breast cancer.”
No one is too young to get breast cancer.
Every life is sacred.
No Half Measures 
“Every life is sacred.”
This line particularly struck my heart this morning.
Would outcomes improve if there were a plaque on our doctors’ desks in exam rooms as a reminder that we all matter? My gut says yes. It’s part of the compassion we deserve.
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I agree!! I think too many doctors rely on statistics instead of paying closer attention to the person in front of them. But it’s not their fault, in the backs of their minds is whether an insurance company would pay for testing. And many docs don’t want to spend their days tied up in red tape. Our system is broken, oh so broken.
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My 34 year old daughter was diagnosed with Stage 4/MBC on July 23 2021. Ten months prior, she told her GYN she felt a lump in her right breast. He felt around and said he couldn’t feel anything, not to worry, it was most likely a gland. She was young and healthy, so no need to worry. About 6 months later, her leg started to hurt. She figured it was from working, muscle pain, no big deal. But it was getting worse, and finally her husband took her to the ER when she couldn’t stand up. While I’m the ER, her husband told her to tell them about her breast lump, which was larger and obvious by now. Immediately, the ER doctor stopped everything and changed perspective. She went for scans and was told it was cancer.
She hid this from me, she ignored this lump growing in her breast and never told me until after her diagnosis. Had I known, I would have demanded her Gynecologist send her for a Mammogram immediately, not brush it off as a gland or nothing to worry about. How did a doctor fail my daughter so miserably? Maybe we could’ve caught it before it spread all over her spine, hips, pelvic bone, shoulder!! What do I do with this anger? She is Er/Pr+ HER2+, and at this point in treatment, she is responding very well. But I can’t find joy or happiness. I feel as though I am watching my daughter die, and there is nothing I can do to stop it. How do these doctors live with themselves?
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I’m so so so so sorry. This scenario happens too often with younger women and we know the cancer is more aggressive in pre menopausal women. Knowing that we have good drugs for her2 receptors is a silver lining but it’s all bad news. Is she getting good support in her area from others living with MBC? Are you getting support?
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Thank you so much for replying. Honestly, there isn’t much support in Hernando County Fl. The only time breast cancer is mentioned is in October when the world goes “pink”. This angers me, I know it shouldn’t, but it does. Breast Cancer isn’t a pretty color, it isn’t cute little slogans and pink socks. It is the destroyer of lives, it is going to take my daughter away from her children, me, her husband and brother.
I take in so much information, I’m learning everything I can. I feel the need to do something, advocate, get people to recognize MBC. Sometimes I just feel like screaming at the top of my lungs.
Your blog has helped me learn so much, I am grateful for everything you have done and continue to do. You are amazing
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I hear you. This has been my experience as well. You might consider linking up with #LightUpMBC to work on raising some awareness around October 13th. It can be helpful to use that anger as a way to effect some change and start some conversations. Just a thought!
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Life is sacred and I wish more people would take it seriously. 😊
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Agreed.
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