An Open Letter to My Eldest, on his 6th Birthday

L, when you came into our lives, you changed everything.  You made me a mom and you have shown me how to look at the world through someone else’s eyes.  You have shown me, most importantly, how to look at myself through someone else’s eyes.  Knowing that you look to your father and I for how to do “life” is both terrifying and amazing in equal parts, at all times.  I know we’ve screwed up and I know that we haven’t known what to do at so many junctures.

Yet, I also know that you know that you are loved.

I know this because I know you sometimes better than I know myself. I have looked into your eyes and watched you assimilate life and experiences your entire life. I have watched how you react and how you do life and how your inner world affects your outer world.

Before you were born and continuing to this very day, your 6th birthday, your father and I have talked about what your future might look like.  We joke a bit about your father deciding that you will attend Harvard for both undergrad and medical school–the point of all that dreaming is that we see your future as unlimited and bright as the sun.  You have so many capabilities and we see so much success in your future; not just academically or professionally, but also because you are an authentic person and you see the best in the people around you.  While we are always happy to hear about how you earn the highest marks in school, what makes us even more ecstatic is to hear about how you are kind and genuine and inclusive and you are yourself, no matter what.

We see how much you love math and how you have amazing visual and spatial awareness.  You have so much natural athletic talent and you love to understand how things work.  Your excitement at discovering new ways to add various numbers or solve word problems astonishes this math deficient momma, but I love that you love it.

Today, and every day, we celebrate you in all your uniqueness and abilities and for the person you are.  We will continue to make mistakes as your parents, but know that we will always love and support you.  You are precious to us, more than you will ever really know until you hold your own firstborn in your arms and your world changes in an instant.

Love Always,

Mom